Be sure to respond on time/hire a lawyer

If you have been served with divorce papers and do not respond within the designated time, this will likely result in a default judgment in favor of your spouse. It is essential that you fill out and submit the Acknowledgement of Service Form to the court before the designated date. If you are not confident with English or with legal matters and would like consultation, you can receive free advice via support organizations such as JBLine(www.jbline.org), ATASK(www.atask.org), AADA(https://www.aadainc.org/) and others. 

For information on finding a lawyer, see “3.1.1 How to choose the right lawyer for your case”.

Things to keep aware of until the divorce is finalized

1. Living expenses

It is possible to acquire child support and alimony through court order if you need living expenses from your spouse during the divorce process. Consult your lawyer if this applies to you.

2. Child and property 

If you have a child under your care, you do not have to give up custody to your spouse even if they request to do so, unless an order is given by the court. You must also comply with any visitation orders from the court. 

In almost all cases when filing for divorce, the court judge will issue a number of standing orders that set the ground rules for both parties. These rules typically prohibit the following actions by one party without the permission from the other: taking a child out of the state or country, changing the child’s school or daycare, making changes to financial assets and property, and borrowing money. Another general rule is that during the proceedings themselves, both parties should remain as cordial as possible and refrain from engaging in aggressive behaviors.        

3. Housing

You are free to remain in your current place of residence during the divorce process. However, if there are any concerns regarding your safety due to domestic violence (DV), consult your lawyer and/or domestic violence shelters and seek asylum. You may also request that the offending spouse be moved out, in which case you should consult your lawyer. 

In the United States, it is a federal offense to remove a child from a country without the consent of the other parent (Title 18, United States Code, Chapter 55, Section 1204) and it is considered as international parental kidnapping, even if the child is your own. Consult your lawyer or a support organization first if you must leave home with your child and follow their instructions. However, if there are immediate concerns for you or your child’s safety, seek safety and report to your local police department. They will be able to assist you with asking for a domestic violence restraining order from the court. 

Create a plan for life after divorce

Collect all necessary financial information, such as both parties’ income, any property and retirement funds (401K), and calculate your estimated cost of living after divorce to find out how much alimony or child support you will require. If there is a possibility that you cannot expect alimony or child support be provided sufficiently (See “5.1 Alimony”, “5.2 Child Support” for calculation method), consider the possibility of taking a job and gather information of welfare eligibility for your state (See “3.4 Thinking about life after divorce”).

*Cited from homepage of Japanese consulate in Houston
https://www.houston.us.emb-japan.go.jp/jp/info/2011/shinkenmondai_Tsuresari.htm